With an increasing population, the hallways of Woodbridge High School are getting a teensy bit crowded. Figuring out who stays and who goes is a difficult task for the administration, but with the help of the traditional game of rock, paper, scissors, finding the right people to remain has become a lot easier.

Tenth grader Nestle Spring said, “I want the hallways to be clear enough for me to actually get to class on time, and without getting elbowed in the side every five seconds.”

What’s supposed to be a safe place for students, has become a can of sardines with absolutely no elbow room. A stroll through the hallway has become a fight to take a few steps without ending up inside of a locker.

Administrators have noticed the issue, and have decided to solve it in the easiest and most fair way possible: rock, paper, scissors.

“I want the students to be able to walk through the hallways without being scared of getting tackled by one of their classmates. Clearing the halls has become one of our top tasks, and we are going to make sure we keep our students and faculty happy,” Principal Lottmann told us.  

Students will be paired with other students from their grade, and the winners will advance to the next round. This will continue until we reach the final two from each class.

Each round will consist of a best of three rock, paper, scissors match. Only the strongest will survive.

The final round will consist of the winners battling amongst each other. The overall winner will have the opportunity to have the first pick.

“I’ve been waiting for the day to finally come around. I’m going into this battle with my best foot forward,” freshman Crystal Waters told the Barron Perspective.

The winners will have the opportunity to pick students from any class. When the sum of 250 students is met, the students who have not been chosen will be forced to leave Woodbridge High School, and never return.

Woodbridge will only hold the strongest and most intimidating rock, paper, scissors, shoot players of all time , and the survival of the fittest will truly come into play.