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Student Written, Student Produced

The Barron Perspective

Student Written, Student Produced

The Barron Perspective

Birth Certificates Now Required to Use the Bathroom

Last week, Mr. Osborne sent out an email to all staff and parents stating that beginning next week, all WHS students are required to present their birth certificates when signing into any of the bathrooms at our school.
An+example+of+the+new+bathroom+policy.
Kevin Modeszto
An example of the new bathroom policy.

Last week, Mr. Osborne sent out an email to all staff and parents stating that beginning next week, all WHS students are required to present their birth certificates when using the bathroom in our school.

This new rule has been put in place to combat the rising rate of identity theft and hall roaming taking place at our school. Students have begun signing in using others’ names to avoid their bathroom usage being tracked.

“I can’t believe it,” said an anonymous WHS student, “I thought the AI cameras were crazy, this is actually crazy.”

Any student who does not comply with this new arrangement will be sent to the main office to wait until their identity is confirmed. 

“I sat there and waited for two hours until my mom came with my birth certificate. But I got out of English class so I’m not mad,” said a second anonymous student.

The office is now packed with students waiting to use the bathroom. Due to this, the secretaries have been forced to stand.

On top of that, students are now out of class considerably longer. Students are out of class for an extra seven minutes on average due to this rule.

This new rule seems to cause more problems than it fixes. Despite this, administration will be doubling down on the new policy. Even some teachers have taken to the new rule.

“Hall roaming is down 56%,” said an anonymous teacher, “this is a great rule. Everything is great.”

However, ninety-nine percent of students polled do not believe everything is great. However, one percent support it. This poll has a one percent error.

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About the Contributors
Emma Aponte
Emma Aponte, Reporter
Emma Aponte is a current sophomore at Woodbridge High School. This is her first year as a staff member of the Barron Perspective. Aponte is a part of the swim team here at WHS and has been swimming since she was young. She enjoys Spanish class and hopes to be a part of the Spanish Honors Society in the future. Outside of school, Emma spends her time lifeguarding, spending time with her family, and traveling. 
Kevin Modeszto
Kevin Modeszto, Managing Editor
Kevin Modeszto, a senior at Woodbridge High School, is a second-year journalism student and first-year managing editor for the Barron Perspective. He is in many school clubs and honors societies, including the Academic Competition Club, and is a secretary of Rho Kappa and Drama Club. Hailing from the town of Port Reading, Modeszto enjoys watching racing and writing, which is one of many reasons he is a member of the newspaper.

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    LadyloveApr 2, 2024 at 8:28 am

    Wow unbelievable things are crazy don’t put ideas in other schools. Don’t the teachers know who’s leaving their classes why not report to the teacher that let them go

    Reply
    • M

      Michael JagoMay 6, 2024 at 7:58 am

      This is a satirical article not meant to be taken seriously! 🙂 WHS does not require birth certificates for bathroom usage.

      Reply