by Emily Swenson and Alan Thompson
After a rift in the space-time continuum was reported by a dazed and confused cooking student, Woodbridge High School’s robotics teacher was seen with a strange device said to allow the user to travel into the future, or back to the past.
The rift was reported at 11:43 A.M. on the morning of March 16th, 2015 while the cooking student was walking around the halls, cutting class. The student, who wished to remain anonymous, said he saw a bright light come from room D8, where Mr. Hoyer holds his robotics class.
“Some crazy lights had me trippin’,” the student said, “and I asked Hoyer what was up. I wanted to know what was happening.” The mysterious lights turned out to be from Hoyer’s newest creation, a Lego time machine, built from the robotics kits, and pieces of the televisions around his room. The motherboard, according to Hoyer, comes from a Lego Mindstorms robot.
Hoyer reportedly seemed concerned about others knowing about his new time travel device. He strictly wanted to use his time machine for good, and not let it fall into the hands of evil, as it so often does in the movies he watches.
Hoyer claimed to aim to bring back a great American as a role model for the delinquents that one experiences in the halls of Woodbridge on a daily basis. His choice? None other than the first President of the country, George Washington.
“Yeah, I just wanted to help out really,” Hoyer said. “A thrilling scientific discovery like this can propel Woodbridge out of the dark ages and restore order to the school.”
Hoyer plans to unveil his creation at the next pep rally, and will surprise everyone with well-known guest speaker, Bolshevik revolutionary Vlad Lenin.
